I used to have a friend named Jennifer. Although she was such a beautiful and easygoing person, she lacked self-confidence. She grew up in an Asian family who saw her as never good or competent enough, while academically she was an excellent student.
There could be a million reasons causing a child to feel unimportant.
One of the biggest reasons will be low self-esteem! Many things can cause low self-esteem.
What is low self-esteem?
According to The Center for Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, “A poor self-image in the literature has the simple meaning that the picture in a person’s mind’s eye of how they view their physical attributes (body self-image), their success in mastering their environment (success, competence, intelligence), and their overall self-worth is distorted by the picture they hold of themselves.”
Here is how we turn a low self-esteem child into a confident person by using Cognitive Therapy.
Build a trustful relationship with your child.
This is the most important step for parents to take. Everyone has to feel understood in order to share their concern with you. Understanding them is the key to finding out what’s been bothering your child and why he/she has such low-self esteem. Spend time with him or her. Ask, “How’s your day?” every day. Hug each other on a daily basis. Support and listen to your child for real, so he/she can feel loved.
Talk through the problem to gain insight.
After gaining trust from your child, they will be able to share what’s on their mind with you. You can start by asking, “Why would you think in this way?” when she/he has told you they think they aren’t important enough. Knowing the situation will help you understand his/her low self-esteem.